Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Don't buy this book -- a review

I was reading the other day somewhere, I don't know where, about a new book called Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough. It's written by a woman who was bright and successful and dated a lot of men she wasn't crazy about so she held out for someone who really made her heart sing, but woke up one day and realized she was forty and not married and had a big old insecurity seizure. She decided the solution to her loneliness problem was to write a book exhorting other women to shelve their dreams of emotional and intellectual companionship and hook up with someone, anyone, because fuck it, what good are dreams anyway. At least I think that's what the book's about. I haven't actually read it. I wouldn't waste my time on that drivel.

Books like this (think The Rules or any of the why-oh-why-am-I-still-single genre) make me batty. They feed right into the psychic vortex of sexual insecurity that our gender seems to possess that tells us we're not complete unless we've glommed onto the right man, or any man. And who better to wax forth on relationships that me, considering my breadth of experience (four engagements and two marriages, thank you very much).

If I had the audacity to tell other people how to live, I would say this: the hell with good enough. Give yourself more credit than that. Ignore the voices all around you shouting about doom and gloom and scarcity and time running out. Let them settle for each other while you listen to your own voice and find your own way in the world. Water has a way of seeking its own level.

So no, I can't recommend Marry Him. It's the worst book I've never read. If you're going to spend your hard-earned money on a book, buy mine. Don't let the fact that it hasn't yet been published stop you.*

* or, for that matter, written.

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  1. I'm with you, Beth. This book sounds just terrible. What a disappointing message it conveys to women everywhere - what was this author thinking?? Or maybe she wasn't, and that's the problem!

  2. Can I pre-order now? I expect a Twitter discount. Ahem.

  3. I expect to be one of the first to buy your book.

  4. The self help book I am writing is called 'Just Fucking Get On With It!'

  5. Jim wins for best f*cking comment. Though he's a little concerned at how much pleasure I took in it.

    Badger, you said "drivel" the other day and now I can't stop using that word. Find me a new word.

    And who is Beth??!

  6. Please please please write a book! That is all.

  7. Thank goodness it wasn't just me. I wondered who Beth was too! I'm also highly amused by Jim and Badgers comments.

    Now then, best get writing that book. I expect you to be bringing me a signed first edition when you come over.


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