Sunday, June 24, 2012

I'm going with thundercyclone

Three quick things:

  • The case went to the feds last week. Finally. Fox4 News did a follow up story last Tuesday (I missed it -- I didn't even know). Can you hear me cheering from halfway across the world?
  • I'm going to be away from the internet for several days (more on that soon).
  • In the meantime, I'm running some old posts from deep in the Wanderlust files.

* * *

Kansas.  One minute it's all blue skies and 95 degree weather and you're tooling along down the road behind some WTF piece of farm equipment.

Hmmm... think I can drive under it?

You pick up the kids from camp and hey, look at that, that's a pretty ominous looking wall of dark clouds on the horizon.  Stop on the way home to grab a movie and when you walk back outside the rain has just started to fall.  Jump in the car and by the time you're at the far end of the parking lot you decide to pull over and park because, um, it now looks like this:


In fact, the wind is blowing so hard that it's buffeting your parked car and debris is hitting the side of it and the trees are bent over in such a fashion that it brings to mind images of gulf coast hurricanes and you expect at any second to see Anderson Cooper go flying by your windshield clutching a CNN microphone.  And now, oh crap, it's hailing. 

Even though you are secretly thrilled by violent weather, you are beginning to get a bit scared.  But not so scared that you don't have the presence of mind to pick up your phone and make a quick "holy f*ck" status update to your Facebook page.

Your kids are asking why you're not driving, are pointing out other cars that are still on the road, are in fact giving you encouragement ("Come on Mommy, you can do it!") and you in turn are pointing out a gushing river of water now dissecting the shopping center parking lot and decide your children do not have a proper appreciation for their own mortality and wonder if this has something to do with the movies you let them watch.

And then suddenly, as quickly as it started, it is over.

On the short drive home, which is perhaps ten blocks, you pass six trees that have been knocked down by the storm.

You use this as a teaching opportunity to explain to your children (who are not listening) why you don't drive in violent storms (because they are busy looking out the window at all the destruction).

When you get home you check your Facebook page to see that your friend who is a storm chaser has left a comment on your status to the effect of "Wahoo!"  And you write him and ask "What the hell was that?!? Just a really badass storm of did it have some special classification like thundercyclone?"  And he said it was probably a storm with a lot of microbursts.  And you have to google microbursts and it still doesn't make a lot of sense to you so you decide to stick with thundercyclone.

Because hey, as long as you have to live in the wrong country, at least it's somewhere exciting.  And that makes you happy.

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